Good Morning happy day!

Sunrise at Hollywood Beach

My grandpa just walked in the front door from running errands, looked around, went to the kitchen and made a tall glass of icey cold water, and brought it out to my grandma lounging poolside reading the
New York Times.

This is kindness. This is thoughtfulness. This is selflessness. 

This is marriage. 

It's love, good and strong, in its purest, most blissful form. 

inspiration

Hey! That right there was just my mini phlog of some pictures I've recently taken. As you can probably tell in my posts, I've slowly but consistently become photo addicted, specifically to photographs others have taken.  I'm so inspired by some photos I see, that with every photo comes to mind captions, and with captions come strings of thought, accompanied by descriptions and pieces of sentences that turn into anecdotes, memories, wishes, dreams, random ramblings, worries, anything, everything, all the things stirring inside me become a mosaic of words to the story the photo tells me.

The photo is no longer just the picture, but the words and the picture together, which become an image, a creation of the mind, something that cannot be said or shown with just the picture or just the words, only ever together in order to mean I meant.

Then, this piece of story is perfect.

It can never be changed or edited, but you can read it over and over. On good days and bad days, on good days you hate you're having and on bad days you like you're having, every time you experience this
word-picture duo, you get a new feeling, a different feeling, a new feeling to an old feeling, an old feeling to a new feeling.

Your feeling changes, the photo stays the same. Your mind wanders, the words stay arranged just so.

I love this about it. I don't feel like I've ever looked at photos this way before. I see a photo and I see the moment captured.  I choose words to go with it. I put the words in the order I feel like they should be to mean what it means.

The pictures I've found by anonymous artists online have fueled this passion thing in me. They rock my world, I love everything about them and love that I don't know anything about them. Are they edited? Altered? What camera took them? Where do they come from? And why?

I want to start having my own photos to do my own. So, little Nikon coolpix, here we are. Let's take some pictures.

Never tell your problems to anyone

20% don't care
80% are glad you have them
#reasonsiblog

Now I'll tell you some non problems.

This sign will go by my back door. Where my friends will come in. 

Because back door friends are best. 

I can't decide whether all those shoes will belong to all my babies running around the house, 

or to all my friends who came by and are sitting in my kitchen having skinny girl margaritas.

Peach Water Dirty Legs

Right Now: 
Just got soaked from walking from my car to my front door in the afternoon flood.
Just ate pretty much an entire frozen pizza alone.
Just finished my homework.
Still damp.
Just looked at the prompt for my 5 page paper due tomorrow night for the first time.
Just printed out my ticket RDU to MIA for tomorrow morning.
Just in time for 5 EOG-taking eighth graders, 4 last-day-of-school seniors, and a mom to get here*.
          *Their entrances were more like auditions for Bagel Bites commercials.

Now really Right Now: 
I will go to J Crew with my mother for some retail therapy in the form of SUMMER CLOTHES FINALLY
and we will get food somewhere after.

Bye!

-oh you want a song?

sin·gle [sing-guhl]–adjective 1. only one in number; one only; unique; sole

2. of, pertaining to, or suitable for one person only

3. solitary or sole; lone.

4. unmarried

5. of one against one, as combat or fight.

8.  sincere and undivided

9. separate, particular, or distinct; individual

10. one person or thing; a single one.

—Synonyms 

1.  distinct, particular. 3.  isolated. 4.  unwed. 15.  select. 18. individual. 

—Can be confused:  1. unhappy, single ; 2. lonely, singular.

where mah summer boy at??

DK's demise has made blogging less alluring. No one to check up on.. no one to copy blogging techniques from.. no one to steal blogging phrases from.. no one to brag about forest park adventures... no one to share the angst of being single at 27 with.. what, we're not 27. Yet... No one to make fun of wearing bangles and scarves and thinking it's trendy.. 

OK she's gone. let's move on. 

then buy her *memoir* when it comes out. 

#blogginggirlsunite

If you can't laugh at yourself, life is going to be a whole lot longer than you'd like.

I got fired from Spanky's.
I cried for a few minutes, then got up and went and jumped in the pool.
I'm too pretty to work.

and to that, i say- may the bridges I burn light the way.

My bunnies and I are both on our periods. Is this weird to put online? I thought it was weird we're on the same cycle. I also have discovered I'm allergic to bunnies. Not officially. But I'm pretty sure. This sucks.
A lot. I haven't decided what/if I'll do about it/-i'll do anything about it.

"Be the kind of woman, who, in the morning, 

when your feet hit the floor, 

the devil says,

"Oh no, she's up."

In more interesting news, I am on pinterest. things i like about it: you have to get "invited." Not sure what the procedure here is, but it makes you feel exclusive and creative. My username? Shanlife. For something new and different.
But-
ATTENTION WORLD: PEOPLE ARE RE-PINNING ME (!!!)

it feels like nice girls are sitting next to me at the lunch table. this is awesome. 

Now for some single girl fun of the day:
Let's insert our own names into Marilyn Monroe quotes.

"I used to say to myself, "What the devil have you got to be proud of, Shannon Smith?" And i'd answer, "Everything, girl. Everything." 

Make someone happy. Start with yourself. 

The main reason a girl needs a dad is to show her that not all boys are like the ones who hurt her

Happy Feet

Brought to you by Piperlime.com

I started on "Wedges" then clicked on "Girl on a budget." And went back and forth.

Some song while you look..

Aruba by Ciao Bella $56

 Stella by Coconuts $65 $49.50

DV by Dolce Vita- Dave $59

Mitzu 01 by Gomax $49 $39

Diver by Michael Antonio $45 $39.50

Ericah by Report $60

Romario by Enzo Angiolini $99

Schmooze by Not Rated $44

Braxton by Nine West $99

Sunny Medallions by Lucky Brand $39

Safe on my couch, with this, bren, and the apple juice kev brought home for me from his diving practice because he "heard I was sick , and wasn't that thirsty anyway." thanks bo.

B enjoys keeping me updated on what's the latest news on SportsCenter *duh nuh nuh nuh nuh* including stats of every sport imaginable and interviews with hot NBA players. He also talks me through the Western Conference Finals -first game, everyone. I'm actually getting pretty ESPNsmart. He's lucky I'm too lazy to get up and start a channel war. I'm lucky because when he gets up he brings me back a freez-e pop.

ESPN, i know we've been hanging out a lot, but i just don't see this going anywhere. no hard feelings..

Adventures of an air-headed daddy's girl, episode 27

Today I stole a parking spot from Granville. 
Background: I was throwing up all night, still felt sick today, but went to class anyway. I didn't want to walk all the way from my normal [legal] parking spot, so i decided i'd be sneaky and try and park closer to class. Which also happened to be a towing zone for non-permit holders.  Faults all on me, I'm an idiot for thinking I'd get away with it. But if i've learned anything, it's that you don't park in spots where you're not permitted to park. what! Shocker!
yeah, i know..
Gotta start somewhere.
anyway, i got the $100 cash from the bank to pay the towers off.
at 4:45 pm.
the bank closes at 5.
Which is also when the towing place closes.
Called my dad, in tears, to come save me, as if i were stranded in the middle of the ocean on a plank surrounded by sharks.
Then called the towing place to sweetly ask them to stay open until 6.
He hesitated.
Then obliged. 
file under- the joys and fast-breaks of being a girl in the 21st century.
Went to Starbucks to ease my churning stomach and chilled fever with some hot green tea and big leather chair.
And also to plug my laptop in to look up directions to this place.
And get out of the rain.
My dad arrived at 5:45
...After dropping 2 clients, finding my brother a ride to work, and trudging through rush hour traffic from Cary to Chapel Hill.
He wrapped me in his thermal long sleeved shirt and made my crying seem silly and over dramatic, while he handed me five 20's and told me to stop worrying, that daddy will take care of it.
We drove to the towing place 20 minutes out, in the middle of nowhere, with the help of my scribbled down mapquest directions (so 2002) on the back of some media law notes.
The guy came out, the three of us starting talking awkwardly.
He and my dad then took over the conversation.
Sharing stories, discovering mutual friends, and acting like old buddies themselves.
How is my dad so good at that?
He's great.
i'm so lucky.

In other news, I'll be headed to Michigan July 19-26. By myself. #singlegirljetsetting #literally. My grandpa's in progressing stages of Parkinson's. My grandma called me this evening to tell me about how I have to come and oh, how she's already bought my plane ticket for those dates. Good thing I'm not doing anything in the middle of July anyways. Am I being sarcastic? I can't even tell anymore.

Typical Tuesday night. #taylorswiftforeveryoccasion

Slow days in Cary

Nothing like it.

Nothing better.

I miss it already.

I haven't even left. 

file under: is that even possible, growing up nostalgia of a hot-mess-20-something, bedtime thoughts

where mah long hurr at??

All that I have is on the floor.

And I'm picking it all up and starting again.
Literally, because my clothes are strewn about my carpet, if i even still have one. Did we get hardwoods? Wouldn't know.
And mentally, because I need to grow up.
Or at least acknowlege it.

file under: 2 a.m. ramblings, should go to sleep before i keep typing nonsense into this little white box, feel hungover i'm so tired..

"Thumbs up if you knew this song or Adele before Glee!" -eatupfatkid 21 hours ago

i didn't know this song. or Adele. or that it was on Glee before. But boy girl am i glad i do now.

I won't let you close enough to hurt me,
No, I won't rescue you to just desert me,
I cant give you the heart you think you gave me,
It's time to say goodbye to turning tables.

So I let another one crumble to pieces, and I realized it was because of my own fear. I realized I didn't open up. I realized I couldn't yet. I couldn't give. Take. I realized that the entire time, I was scared. Scared to jump in. Scared to talk about it. Scared it would happen again. Scared to even consider letting it. I'm not ready, i guess. I'm not ready to be ready. I thought I was. But I got so close, too close, to that feeling of completely falling for someone again. It's weird, it's so dangerous to me now. It's like I have a lifeguard in my brain blowing her whistle loud in my ear just as soon as I get too close. Should I be angry for the guard I've put up for myself? It's frustrating, I won't lie. I've never had such big walls for my own heart's sake. Used to be steel. Never felt like I needed them. But I feel strength in that someday, someone will be worth tearing them down for. And until then, I'll laugh in the faces of the imposters and say, "HA! Out to break hearts? Not this girl's, you're not."

that was really cheesy.

Left.
It happens.
Vulnerable?
Never again.

happy mothers day mama

She's snuggly, she's pretty. She'll tell you no like you've never heard no before. She'll treat you like a princess on your birthday. She puts too much butter on all your food, and never lets you forget your table manners. She buys the organic oreos because they're healthier, and knows better than to throw away rotten bananas.  She's the best valentine you'll ever have because she always remembers your favorite chocolate. And that you needed fuzzy pink crocs to go with it.  She'll make you stay in to watch late night reruns of Friends, but you'll be glad you did because this usually means she'll let you eat Lucky Charms in her bed. She knows a good smile from a bad day, and never gets tired of hearing about it. When you don't feel like talking, she'll talk to you anyway. And when you just feel like crying, she'll let you. She believes every morning is a fresh start, and says pumpkin pie absolutely counts as breakfast. She'll surprise you with a new scarf just because she thought you'd look pretty in it. She's got an eye for a good pair of jeans, and especially if they come in longs. She'll tell you whether he's cute or not, even if it's your waiter. She'll wait up all night for you to get home, and knows a good hangover from a bad cold. She'll make any boy wish he never actually made himself at home, but she always sets an extra place at the table if she likes him.  She's beautiful, she's smart, she's everything i wanna be. I luv u mama!

i hate boys and think i'm better than all of them

 

Said it, wut u gunna do??

why do we want boyfriends? 

then when potentials come along,

Not want boyfriends. 

Like, what?

what's so good about them? 

don't answer that. 

where are all the good ones? 

taken.

With all the wrong girls.  

i believe in love again.. 

i don't know why.

or when it happened. 

Despite all the logic and hard-headed sense i've been trying to train myself to have...

i notice it at work.

Like today,  

i sat a freshman girl with her lanky boyfriend. 

at the window seat for two.

they laughed the whole time. 

This time next year one will probably be broken-hearted. 

i hope it's him. 

because it probably won't be. 

I also sat a wrinkly white-haired couple for dinner. 

at the other window seat. 

They were chatty, smiley. 

they got dessert when they finished their meals.

This time next year one will probably be dead. 

i hope it's both. 

 because those desserts are too sweet to finish alone.

your heart belongs to you