Bed blogger

I'm really tired
Kinda stressed
too full
Haven't packed
Nauseas from being so tired
Skipped my BC three days in a row
Can't find my sunglasses
Didn't shower
Maybe I'm nauseas from skipping three days in a row
My feet are cold because the blanket won't reach
My arms are sore from holding my phone up
As I'm observing my physical state I realize that I'm also extremely thirsty

But I am so happy... that I could scream. If I had the energy. And a glass of water. I'd happy scream my vocal chords to pieces.

Leggings until the day I die

Have you ever been to a chocolate festival?
Have you ever lost track of how many chocolate things you've eaten in one day?
Have you ever truly been chocolate wasted?

And if the answers are all yes, have you ever regretted it?

I am about 63 pounds happier and don't think my stomach has ever gone to such stretches as it did this weekend in Perugia for euro chocolate festival 2012.  I just want to give a big THANK YOU to my wardrobe team for picking out an elastic skirt and oversized long-sleeves to wear that morning, because while the stretchy outfit was unintentional it was totally the smartest thing ever because chocolate baby is overdue.  And now I can't even look at my skinny little Citizens, much less fit into them, no I'm not planning on even trying.  I'm kind of exaggerating but.. kind of not. So leggings- I'm looking at you. Dazzle me. Or at least give me something to wear.

1. The Leggings that Look Like Pants but are Leggings

Are ingenious. Find the seams and tailoring of your skinny jeans without the sitting down part where you have to kind of slouch with your butt on the edge of your seat and your legs as straight out as possible because they're too tight. And without looking like you're on your way to dance practice. I like black because I don't have black pants, but these are hot and would look great with all the fur vests I have. ..Just kidding I wish I even had fur vests to say that about but they're under a hundred at Free People and should be worn with highly contrasting textures like fur or gauze or wool to avoid giving anyone the slightest idea that you actually think these are real pants. 

2. Leggings that Look Less Like Pants but Still Kinda Look like pants but No Button or Zipper

Or denim seams that leave a long seam imprint down your thigh when you peel them off.  And they're stonewashed, like everything should be. These are Calzedonia, which are everywhere here (and have cute youtube commercials) so maybe you'll have to find an American equivalent on your own. Or I can do that for you. (And they're on sale! I'm so good to you.)  Warning: these guys are so comfortable you won't be able to stop rolling around on the carpet in them and might be late for class. P.s. guys can be used in more than one way there if you want. 

3. The Be Girly Without Having to Be Girly  

in black lace. So FP wanted to go ahead and do it again with the oversized tee as a dress look and I couldn't think more highly of it.  What better cure for the post chocolate festival chub sickness (it's a sickness, I swear) than the oversized tee as a dress look? But the leggings are the star of this look here, and your winning numbers? $36 and .64.  They're sheer so they may not be a complete substitute for your pants that wont button anymore, but I think I said they were only $36.64.. Oh, yeah, yep yes I did. And verbally compared it to winning the lottery.

4. Fake Leather, Original Gangsta

Wearing fake leather is like being Lana del Rey. People might make fun of you, but you are so awkwardly glamorous and badass, it really doesn't matter. If you don't know how to be glamorous and badass, it's really easy and addicting. I'll teach you. 1. Get these here 2. When they come in the mail (because you probably don't have three Zaras down the street from you if you don't live in Florence) lay on your floor while you put them on and play Ride. 3. Get up and put your sunglasses on before you walk out of your room. And continue to wear them around the apartment. When people ask you what's wrong, keep a straight face and respond "nothing." If you ruin it and start laughing, just tilt your head to the sky and spread your arms out and say something hipster like, ~don't be a tourist, be a traveler.~ And no one will question you again. 

5. The Yess Already Have These 

These are also Calzedonia, but doesn't matter because they're just gray and plain and perfect.  Let's just be sure to take a second to pledge that we won't pair them with a sweatshirt and/or Uggs.  There are too many pretty studs and hot-to-the-touch leather out there in Fall 2012 shoe land to ever go back to Uggs, and if you feel so choco-fat that you put on a sweatshirt with your leggings.. you need to get back in your underwear and back into bed. That's just cheating so try a big tank from this summer and a jean jacket instead.  No one will know that there isn't anything ab-like or skinny under there.  That's the difference between the sweatshirt and the actually-got-dressed-this-morning.

So when you accidentally eat too much chocolate this fall, remember it's okay. Because it was delicious and you're too busy catching the train to get back to class to regret anything these days anyway.  Also because now you have the magical leggings trend to sneak into, without anyone ever knowing your 28 Longs said no. It's like a trick and a treat.

Sometimes

When I'm laying in bed about to fall asleep I just think..

We're the lucky ones.

Things, as of late

-Fridays, and precious redheads
-Mario the fresco prof has starting bringing us breakfast from the bakery across the street.. So with that and the American style coffee he makes us every morning.. Mario you're in the running of becoming Italy's BEST PROFESSOR IN THE GD WORLD and you make it really hard not to be consistently excited to wake up for a 9 am.
-When I walked into a building trying to figure out if it's a police station and literally had to resort to asking "excuse me.. where am I? The man pointing to his badge did nothing for me but thank goodness for the bilinguals of the world.
-iPhone pictures of my mom's kids posing in front of the whiteboard all dressed up for tAcKy DaY.
-Italian college kids that have to hang out with us on Fridays so we can practice conversation. It's like  the x-rated version of Italian class. Let's just say we aren't learning how to say "I studied and went to sleep last night" Alone, at least.
-Dates with girls at a ristorante where you sit down sober and stand up, hours later, not sober.
-I haven't been very good about taking pictures
-Sitting on roofs under sunsets for little trips to aperitif heaven. We do a lot of sitting here. And a lot of aperitifs.
-My bunnies were jealous of the baby lamb from the post I wrote about holding a baby lamb so that was awkward. So was skyping with them.
-Mastering the art of making the perfect amount of pasta for one serving. No more still-hungry lunches or ohmygod-are-you-sure-a-box -is-one-serving dinners?
-It gets very very quiet outside the apartment on Friday afternoons and I like thinking it's because everyone's cuddled up at home relaxing after a long week.
-Swedish House Mafia is hot and I'm seeing them in December in Amsterdam so there's your 99% probability that I'm staying here forever.
-Starting not to care about anything back home anymore, minus people, and it's kind of sad but like, no, Twitter, I don't want to follow Michael's and Topo, your specials today mean nothing to me because I think I don't miss you at all.
-I cleaned our bathroom and it was half- awful never doing this again, half- satisfying. And half- unspoken best roommate of the week award. And how the boyfriend (!!??!) thought it was "so nice" from 8000 miles away and.. doesn't even live here. I'll do it a hundred times again if he keeps it up.

Ok when you put cleaning bathrooms on the list it's time to stop the list. But aren't clean sinks the best?

The day the pasticceria had its way with me and I liked it

Yesterday I went to the questura to get fingerprinted for my permit of stay. At 6:45 am. It was an hour I hope no one has to experience.. ok it's not that early.. and it's actually freezing in the mornings now but when you endure it with friends, it ends up 1. being not that bad and 2. with a chocolate croissant. Soooo you know you gotta multiply by 3. Going ahead and admitting it here like it's one of those confession boxes: Yesterday I ate 6 croissants. Depending on whether or not you want to count the ones with chocolate inside.  I swear I would have had it together if it weren't for the way they smell when you walk by. Or for the nice fat man who tells you buongiorno like it's your first day in Italy. But it was, and I didn't, and sometimes, you just have to give in to the seduction of the pasticceria.

Dead ends, clarified

If you need me, I'll be the one in the hat and ostrich feather dress, sulking with a baby goat in my arms out somewhere in the Italian countryside. I found out there is no Zadig and Voltaire in the United States. My life is almost meaningless. I had written a post about wanting to design and work in art direction for the brand, because I love it so much.  But didn't take more than 5 minutes and an airhead moment to realize if I want to work for a non-American brand, I'll have to work in ..not America.  It doesn't really matter though because passion is fate and we'll still be together somehow, someday. I just know it. Even if I have to fly back and forth to work for the gorgeous brand. Went back again to the store yesterday just to pout in the bittersweet heartbreak. Doused myself in his and her eau de toilettes because I didn't particularly care if I smelled like him or her, as long as it was both Z and V.  Then I strolled along the racks of fall clothing trailing my fingers against the sweet wool and pyramid studs, pausing to admire the leather bags and the spiked heels.  A gentle goodbye.. a simple see you later.  When it was time to part ways, I looked up at Camile Rowe in all of her white-framed sophistication as I placed my sunglasses over my eyes and shed a single tear. Then I made my final, graceful exit and went on my way.  This wasn't goodbye, this was see you around. (press play for full effect-->) 

Ok. We're good now. Happy Sunday to youu hope it feels like sheets and smells like coffee!

Taking over this town, they should worry

I don't have anything particularly interesting to say, other than it's cold and rainy today so thanks for sending the big weather boomerang that I aimed at your couch last night back over.  Except I don't really care that you did that because it's just as cozy and fun as you all tweeted it was. Well, as cozy and fun a day can be without a big blanket and a chest.  But it's okay because we're sitting here in the rooftop student lounge with cappuccinos and a kick ass view of the duomo so I think I'll be ok.  Besides, the chilly mist makes my cheeks kind of red so it looks like I remembered to put on makeup this morning.  Also really thrilled about my umbrella- I paid a street vendor 10 euro (mistake #1) for a flimsy piece of mechanical failure with a really, really bad Louis Vuitton pattern. (mistake #2). Plus being tall and carrying an umbrella in the city sucks because you just end up holding it way above your head trying to get past everyone else also carrying umbrellas. So I'd say I'm probably better off ditching the umbrella, ducking beneath the crowds of umbrellas and making a run for it.  I'm so city chic it's not fair.

Pick me up, oh, from the bottom up to the top, love

Ev a ree dayyyy

Every day this is what's for dinner. #italyproblems 

But today I tried to mix it up and put chicken and chopped up onions in a pan with some butter.. and when everyone came home it was an OH-MY-GOD-WHATDIDYOUCOOK fest. I tried to explain I literally just threw those foods in a pan as if I was playing kitchen in elementary school or something, but I mean if they want to think of me as Top Chef from here on out then that's on them. I'll just answer to when called upon carry on with the oh gosh, no, not me's! Here here for domestic triumphs!

hollywood from danielletodesco on 8tracks Radio.

and good playlists

MOOR GOOD LOOKS (pretend like all the OO's are eyeballs) 

-Gas stoves. Have won me over in the internal struggle vs. electric.  I didn't even know gas stoves still existed- which has brought me a lot of dumb blonde smack from my roommates #caryproblems- but now I know and prefer gas ones. They'll boil water even if you watch the pot, and before your stomach starts eating itself while you wait. 

-The iOS6 little monkey emojis because they are just so little and cute and I just want to pick them up and pet them and talk to them in high pitched voices all day.

-Beer steins fresh from Oktoberfest, sitting proudly amongst the other taken bar glass in our cupboards. We've bred a skillful team of bar glass collectors in this apartment.  In a league so premier we don't even use regular cups anymore. Gotta make the 6.5 euros/drink worth it. 

-Facetime with my littlest bro who just got a fresh haircut and his braces off and could quite possibly be the handsomest fella in the world.  Actually no I'm sure he is. 

-Masquerade ball masks to be worn around the apartment at all times, especially when doing laundry, buying Swedish House tickets online or drinking green tea. Whichever you feel is more appropriate. 

-The Boboli gardens but not really at all because sitting up there in the sun for 3 hours of class while you paint the city and mosquitoes snack on every part of exposed skin would be suicidal without my friend K to complain with and the new Ellie Goulding album on repeat to remind me it wont last forever. 

-I get gelato every day. 

Now stop tweeting about movies and snuggling up on your man on this cold rainy day.  

It's 72 here, we have all the windows open and it feels fantastic. 

Can I break it down

Yesterday was quiet and productive, the kind of morning that lasts all afternoon. Last night was effortlessly fun, the kind of white peach sangria that makes you love your friends more than life itself.  Today was good, the kind of futbol game afternoon that initiates you as a real live European.  And now I'm listening to this:

and laying in this

and drinking this

And thinking about this

Thank god for weekends. 

"The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing" -Socrates

Before I left America, my grandma reminded me to have a wonderful time and not to order coke, order beer.  That the coke isn't good here, but the beer- The beer is good.

After classes, I like to walk around the city for no particular reason other than I really have nothing else to do and also I like being by myself way more on average than your basic loner.  Today after class I was walking in the direction of my apartment on the other side of the river and realized I really didn't have anything else to do. I mean I could always go into the studio and work on projects, but obligations.. there were none.  I didn't have any more classes for the day, no work to go into.. no baby to get home to.. (haha.. sorry I read mom blogs) but there I was, walking along Via back-road-something with a free afternoon and a cute outfit. So I decided I'd keep it that way. For a few hours at least. I was trying not to eat until dinner because we got really drunk last night and had enormous amounts of some late night snacks but I was starving and it was around 4 anyways.

Learned in class this is an American crop.
Midway through the legs.
Italian crop is an extreme close up

So I went to this pizza cafe I recently found that is so yum and doesn't make you pay to sit at the tables outside and got some pizza and remembered not to get a coke. You are the loner American girl, I said to myself, sitting down by herself with an entire ok yeah, an entire pizza and a beer and you don't even have a phone to look at to pretend like you have something to do.

It's not that it's even that weird to eat at places by yourself, I just manage to make it weird because I end up staring at people until they think I'm plotting to steal their children.  So it's a tough thing to get used to, sitting by yourself without a phone, but at least I had a cute outfit.

It took me 42 minutes to finish eating and drinking and staring.  And when I got up to throw my plate away I tripped a little bit on my chair, which definitely absolutely everyone just saw you do that and stopped eating to raise their eyebrows at you and hide their children and you're like wait I promise I didn't trip because I'm tipsy, it's just this chair see it was like this.. Then I realized no one cares and definitely no one was looking so I just hurried away.

But then there it was again- where was I headed? Anywhere never really means anywhere, you know,   but it kind of did for me this afternoon.  I took a random turn on Via shoot I swore to myself I would remember the name of it where walked inside a little piece of perfection called Zadig and Voltaire.  And some hours later I walked out and decided it was for that brand I wanted to work. For that brand, I wanted to stay up late hours on my computer working on mood boards. For that brand, I wanted to spend the afternoon with everything spread out on my kitchen table and my fingers sore from holding scissors for too long. For that brand, I wanted to wake up that extra hour earlier to be sure the scans looked good before they were due.  I can't explain it, but something just clicked.  It was like all the designs, the colors, the attitude of the entire place were all stacked up in the middle with a sticky note that said "Art Direction for Zadig and Voltaire: the what Shan wants edition" 

So I don't know, whatever inspiration means these days, there was mine. Inspiration makes you feel like the moment is so magnificent and grand, like it's a landmark day in the history of your life and there's finally something to look at out the car windshield. Glad I was wearing a cute outfit for it. 

Tell me whatchu know about dreamin

Mushy gushy love grits and bacon and actually nothing that American at all

I don't even know what to say about Amalfi coast this weekend because it was that perfect. More perfect than any picture or any blog post can say and I wish more than anything that everyone in the world gets to go there someday.  It's like your head forgets work and school and everything that ever stressed you out or made you cry so that there's room in every part of your body to soak up all the beautiful and happy that ever existed in the world.  It's the early morning Caprese breakfasts on the water. The icy limoncello shots on the beach. The swimming through turquoise. The boating everywhere you need to go. The jumping off 40 foot cliffs like you think you can fly and wading in grottos in the middle of the ocean like you think you're a mermaid. It's making more new friends than you thought possible and toasting to the moment. It's the collapse in exhaustion under a late afternoon sun and the warm sun-soaked stones you mindlessly organize on your tanned stomach. It's the foreign accents you play with on the bus back and the hours of laughing with friends in showered hair and new sweatshirts until you fall asleep in your tiny tropical bungalow.

And now I'm back in Florence, 7 hours north and another kind of paradise. The kind that feels like a home, while being so far away from home. And where the best wifi in town connects me to the home I still miss so much, no matter how perfect this one gets.